All, we would like to share the somber news that my grandmother, Betty Margaret Pratt, left us on Sept. 27, 2021 while at the Avamere Assisted Living Facility in Hermiston.

She was preceded in death by her husband, Lloyd; and two son’s, Arnold and Cy; and is survived by many grandchildren, great-grandchildren and great-great-grandchildren.

I have always thought of my grandma’s life in four chapters:

Her first Chapter was growing up in Alameda, Calif. on an idyllic American street lined with classic craftsman houses. 

At twelve, tragedy struck, and her world was turned upside down when her mother passed away from cancer. This loss impacted her deeply for the rest of her life leaving her with a too real sense of the fragility of the world. In her whole life, not one time, did she ever drive into Bend because it scared her too much and mind you, back then, Bend wasn’t much bigger than Burns. 

From a young age, we knew better than to make noises when she was driving because it would cause her to pull over and flip out on us and I mean even on the three blocks of backroads from her house to main street. In addition to her “nerves”, grandma was a legendary control freak, which I believe was an attempt to keep other bad things from happening to her. 

Yes, she immediately raked her green shag carpet whenever it had a “footprint”. Losing her mother early aside, my grandma was of her generation and lived by the “waste not, want not” saying. Yes, she saved all the ties from bread, she washed then re-used tinfoil; and reused bread bags to pack lunches and the list could go on. Also, true to her generation, she believed marriage was for life and theirs ended just shy of 60 years when we lost grandpa.

Her second chapter was getting married, moving to Burns, and becoming a mother of twins. She met my grandfather in an unconventional way, and you could even say it was the “on line” way of starting a relationship of their day. 

While in WWII, my grandpa became close friends with a buddy whose wife happened to be best friends with grandma. This couple encouraged them to become pen pals and they wrote to each other for two years. Grandpa’s buddy was named Arnold and is who my father was named after. 

At the end of the war in 1944, he swept through Alameda, married her, and brought her to Burns. Although she often talked about the shock she experienced going from city living to small-town life, she adjusted well and lived there the rest of her life. 

At 23 she had surprise twins. She must have told me a million times that the doctor did not believe her when she was still in so much pain after delivering my uncle, but soon, everyone understood as my dad pushed is way out into the world. In those days, they did not have the technology to know in advance. 

As it happened, there were eight sets of twins around that time in Burns and they even formed a club that grandma was a part of. She thrived as a homemaker and was devoted to taking care of what she called “her men”: my grandpa, uncle and father.

Her third chapter was grandchildren and she was the ultimate grandma to us. She often said that she regretted not having more children which was decided by them after the impact of surprise twins. However, she showered all that stored love onto her grandchildren. 

My brother, Lloyd Jr., and I are 18 months apart and we were often called Arnold and Cy by her especially when she was mad at us. She loved to dress us as twins in matching outfits until my brother was old enough to put a stop to it. 

I am now in my 50s, which is the same age my grandma was when I started having memories of her. She always referred to her 50’s as her best decade. I can picture her then, headed to town to shop or dine in her new Cutlass Oldsmobile with its V8 and red leather interior. She was thin, wearing a new outfit, hair and makeup perfect, smelling of her Jasmin perfume, behind the wheel, and popping her gum with the Burns’ radio station turned up (her one and only exception to the “no noise while driving” rule). 

As many of you know because you had to put up with us wherever she went, we were spoiled rotten by her. My brother and I took her to the Pine Room for her 95th birthday and we reminisced on the many great dinners we had there plus dinners at the Elk Horn, the Hilanders and The Castle not to mention our many toy stops at Nyleens.

In her final chapter, after my grandfather and her sons left this world, and after a time of deep mourning, I watched her find her own independence. 

Like most women of her generation, they went from being daughters, to wives, to mothers, to grandmothers. I saw her learn how to be along, to shovel snow, take care of her car, and deal with the yard for the first time in her life. She often told me that she didn’t know why she was still here, but I think, and to her own surprise, this final chapter gave her a chance to enjoy doing exactly what she wanted to do with her time and her money. She drove until she was 95 although she had limited it to basically driving across the street, daylight only, to the grocery story (which was a good thing!) She was determined to not be a burden to anyone and managed to live on her own until she was 97!!!

I am honored to have known my grandmother and grateful of all the love she gave me. We should all be so lucky to live such a long, amazing life. She experienced amazing highs and survived some very low points that left her a force to be reckoned with. Grandma’s need for perfection in an imperfect world was frustrating for her but wildly entertaining for me. 

She was complicated and often did not understand her own dazzling sense of humor, but I always did. When I am missing her as I am now, I think back to something she said a lot: “can’t I get just a little peace and quiet… what is all that racket??!”. She said this countless times. In fact, she yelled it at me from her recliner while I was cooking her dinner (banging the pans too loud apparently) last year when we were moving her to assisted living. It was oddly comforting as it took my back to my childhood and all those times with my grandparents. 

Well, family and friends, she has found her peace and quiet and has joined “her men” and I hope Gigi too, her poodle who loved to bite us and our friends when we were all kids.

We will be holding a service for grandma this summer and will announce those details sometime in spring.

Like raising children, taking care of your grandmother in her 90s from another state takes a village and I would like to give special thanks to some of you whose help was so invaluable. My mom, for always being there to help with whatever was needed. 

My little sister, who took her shopping weekly (which, as mentioned, our grandma’s need for perfection and control made this no small feat!) She adored you, Tia! 

Heidi Sands, I don’t think I could have let her be on her own that last year without you. Your gift for caring for others is extremely special! 

Elly Ledgerwood who literally has the patience of a saint and provided so much support over the eight years that grandma was at the Grove after her house became too much. 

Finally, my sister-in-law, Leilani Pratt, who took such good care of her in Hermiston when she was such a handful (to put it very nicely!) And thank you to the many I missed here as Burns really is a community that takes care of its own.  

Finally, my grandma would want me to close this by sharing something she always said, “you are never too old to have your best decade!” Words to live by